And you know what friends? It is a recurring pattern here at this apartment- EVERY time something really wonderful happens for me and the kid, like getting the job at the florist, coming home with a bucketful of flowers, and now the new car- the very next day, like freakin' clockwork, I find a note full of threatening and harassing content from her on my steps. Always left when I've gone out... And if I refuse to pick up and take the nuclear blast of negativity on that paper ...into my home, and just leave it there, she has the nerve to climb the stairs when I'm not home and tape it to my door.
I came home with the car yesterday. I was out ridding ourselves of 6+ months of recycling (the woman at the dump didn't charge me the day use fee- a celebration of "Hey- you got a car!"), just doing some errands in general- and I came back at almost sundown and there was a paper on my steps..... And now begins her incessant door slamming...
OH, BOY.... wait until the BRAND new STOVE and the BRAND new *energy star* refrigerator arrive (because we have an AWE-some landlord!)...
Now, I'm hooking up the new SURROUND sound speakers for the living room. They're getting test driven on an episode of Supernatural
Too bad that my/our good fortune and Light and Loving energies make other people so angry.... Oh well. Carry On, Ursula Carrie! :)
Now that I have the car, I have launched into a process of slow recovery. It's like a recuperation period after a natural disaster. Feels like that. Some of the laundry has been dirty and sitting, waiting for over a year. Most of the recycling that's not picked up here was out about 7 months... We have medical check ups that we are 1 to 2 years behind on... But, tomorrow, as I am committed once per week, I am dedicated to my Yoga Practice at home. If I have learned one thing from being restrained is that- everything will have it's time, I will never really get it all done, and peace inside of myself is the fuel that makes so much more possible. Temperance. (not exactly in the biblical way, but more the first definition... smile emoticon )
heart emoticon To You All
July 31, 12:22 am
Well, our kitchen stove has been dead for almost 2 weeks, now. It died 2 days before I picked the new car up. It would seem, that in order to enjoy the fullness of the Human experience- of which eating hot, cooked foods is an integral part- we are, ok I Am, learning to Master the Art of Microwave Cooking.... Hmmm, the mustard greens didn't come out so bad.... And instead of lamenting the absence of my beloved Omelette, I am indulging in my absolute most favorite Summer Food of all time- Fresh Mozz, and Tomato with homemade Pesto on some sort of delicious bread. Foccacia the past few days- tomorrow it is on Ciabatta to take to work.... I'm going to indulge in that until I can't stand it any longer, which will tide me over until next year's tomato season wink emoticon At least until the new stove comes... Next week? IDK
July 31, 7:23pm
Well, now the car's dead, too! I left it tucked up in the parking lot in the shade. I told my cab drivers- "See? You thought you'd gotten rid of that bitch!" (Um, ME!) LOL! SMILE smile emoticon They tried to get me a jump, but it wasn't enough juice. Maybe it needs a new battery. If I wasn't Who I AM, I'd probably be something other than laughing right now.... Yes, God, I have Faith. I know that Everything works out. NO, I am not allowing what is not real to tangle me up... And thanks to Jim and Jeffrey- Jim drove me home, and Jeff is hauling his grumpy ass out in the morning to take me into town... OM, Hunnies ....Time for a brew and some "Supernatural"... XoXo heart emoticon
Any of this sound familiar? :)
Then, I say, "I give up."
I was giving up on sleep.
where all of the muscular contraction is,
Something lifted. And I felt a Peaceful feeling wash over the left side of my body and enter my Heart.
Then, I was dreaming, about something.
Then the alarm went off, reset at 5am for 8 o'clock.
I turn it off, saying as I often do when I have to get up before I really want to, "God, please, Give Me Strength..." Please...
August 1, 5:15pm
So, of course Dad troops down all the way from Waterford today. He finds me at my job, I go out for a bit with him to the parking lot. His friend that he called is already at my car. I hand Dad the keys. He gets in the car, puts the key in the ignition, turns it and..... VROOOOOM! The f-ing thing starts right up. He turns it off, looks up at me standing there. I'm thinking, "What the f.....?!" He says, "So.... what was the problem?" Somewhere, someone is sipping on some cosmic beer, around some etheric campcircle, saying, "Did you see her wake up in a panic at 3am today? Oh, my, my, my.... This One, right here.... What an Ursula..." (that's what my Gramie Carrie used to say when she was tickled with me- which was often, she loved me so much...) I'm a living, conscious example that worry is a waste of time- because everything always works out. But, Monday, I have an appointment at the garage that I like to give this baby a once-over smile emoticon Geez.... heart emoticon
BY THE WAY, I LAUGHED WHEN HE GOT TO THE END AND SAID,
I had a miserable night, I lost precious sleep. I thought the car was junk.
And all my Dad did was sit behind the wheel, and...