30 August 2017

I'll have to Back-pedal after this post...

(from my personal Facebook wall, just now)
We got back here just about a week ago.
Immediately, we went to the vet to pick our cats up and found that Dreamy has some sort of tumor in her mouth, which may or may not be cancer. The selfie that I took on Monday, after I had returned the rental car to Beacon, NY, (after I brought Dreamy to the vet for numerous procedures) shows me looking tired, stressed and haggard already.
at the Beacon, NY train station, waiting for the train to Poughkeepsie- 4 days back already looking as worn out as I feel
I had one 8 hour day at the job on Friday. By 11am on Saturday (2 hours into the shift), I was doubled over with severe pain in my solar plexus. The upcoming endoscopy will tell me if I have an actual ulcer or not. I work with women, who are my mothers age, who can not stop obsessing about the size of my body. The one woman who harassed me for 2 months straight (because of the renewed/reduced size of my pants), so bad that the people I work for thought they had to call for a mediator, now keeps her back to me- ALL DAY LONG. Can you imagine this?
Meanwhile, I had made a *life desire list*, well my son wrote it out for me while I was driving on the return trek back to this place. I can't call it "home", for I have felt neither welcome or comfortable here for years, now. The bitch downstairs apparently has the same problems with my presence, which is constantly demonstrated with bizarre harassment throughout the 7 years that we have been here. I know that these women are just unhappy with and hate themselves, but I am not here on the planet to "fix" anyone. I am not interested in anyone unless they truly want to improve, like the clients who come to me for soul realignment.
I know you changelings, and those critters (i.e. negative entity attachments) that are attached to so many humans who are souls of the Light. I know, "growth" and "the light" is not your game. And I can tell you, as my Light Quotient expands, as I continue, while housed in this physical body, to transform into the higher energies, I notice the negative souls are coming out in droves to try and pick, and pick.
So, yes a list that I'd felt very clearly while I was feeling so incredibly empowered and full of life and joy on this amazing 9 day road trip with my son. Because, I could feel myself, then- my true uninhibited Self. It felt good and beautiful.
And now, I am dealing with the frustration of how effing slowly change often does occur in the physical. I want it now. Just saying. So, all I can do today, it would seem, is pray for assistance in working through all of the anger and frustration that I woke up with today, and let go of thoughts about going to the job tomorrow. AND, to not fall back into that complacency that feels like being in a prison!
I have a dear human who ordered soul realignment work, while I was still travelling. I need to cleanse myself of these negative distractions, so I can focus on the work that I am really here to do. And I am thanking her for this opportunity to do just that.

here's the video that relates to my comments below:

1 comment:

Rev. Ursula Carrie said...

a friend said (on FB): You must make some changes. I think the first one is find another place to live. That sounds stressful in itself. I'm sure you understand what it does to the mind, body and sprit.

I replied: That's pat of the difficulties in my area, now, Callie. The Hudson Valley had devolved into a housing shortage. This is due to the droves of people who ave relocated here from the NYC area. The landlords have revoked all of the long term housing, and changed them into 'air b&b's', because they are hungry for the money. So, most locals are just holding on by the fingernails, or they have just left completely. I have been searching for several years to no avail. Plus, my son and I thankfully receive assiatance from a local section 8 program, and many landlords, even if there is a rental available for a "local", do not want to declare the income on their taxes. It's a very, very confining situation, here in this area. It's sad and distressing. I have always wanted to make the best of it, but I am at the end of that rope, it seems. Menopause brings a lot of really, Real, to the surface. Yes, it is true that my home is not my sanctuary, and I find it so challenging to do "My Work", here. I am so focused on changing my inner reality so my outer reality follows suit. And when I do change, I get a ton of backlash. More than a decade ago, I made a commitment to Self Mastery. It is not an easy path... I know somehow, the insights will be brought into and illuminated in my consciousness. It always is. And, my Family of Light always asks me to share posts like this, because I am meant to be a living example of how to practically utilize the Law of Attraction, and the powers of the Universe. This process, however also means also going through times, like I am right now...

I also posted the following: AND, with the Universe being the perfect place that it is, Kaypacha posted this week's Plel Report, after my post and all this conversation took place. *CHECK THIS OUT* smile emoticon:) https://youtu.be/KCt6QZIcPzw Very Good.

and this commentary on my post and Kaypacha's report: I have evolved so rapidly in this past year, that the physical relaity that I am currently living is a manifestation of the self that I was many years ago. I am no longer She. Therefore the discomfort and the feeling of urgency within me. It is a Tempering process....