Oh Mama!

{I wrote this on January 5th, even though today is the 10th. I thought I was going to go a little more on this, but I did not. It was so heartfelt when I poured all this out. I had just gotten home from a job and some family errands. My 16 year old son and I have bedrooms that are across the 3 foot hall. We usually stand in our doorways and I give him the update on all that occurred, and he tells me the same- you know the daily news reports from his world and from mine! Then we both go to our rooms! Lol. I was in such a good mood, I wrote this}

I swear! I was born for Motherhood! Seriously. I knew ever since I was a little girl that I wanted a baby. And when I got him, I was full-on dedicated to my new career. What do I need "time for myself" for when I was 29 when I had him, and um.... experiencing parenthood is time for myself, the Mom in me. I never wanted to "get away" from my son, and I was extremely careful about who took care of him when I couldn't. It is pretty true for me that we tend to parent in the opposite ways that our own parents did, as a way to counteract the elements of the upbringing that did not suit our own person. For example, I felt unsafe as a child with the adults around me, so I made damn sure to create an environment of ultimate emotional/spiritual stability for my baby. I have always stopped whatever I was doing, anytime he wanted to talk to me, to listen, deeply. I wanted him to feel, and to know without a doubt, that he was being heard.